How do you know when you’re a golfer? For starters, you might just find golf has infiltrated every aspect of your life, from your choice of car (plenty of boot space) to the way you talk. You may find yourself mowing your lawn to fairway height, or discussing how your shaft feels extremely loudly in public. You probably think sub-par means something must be really, really good, and you’re pretty sure the Dutch Masters is a golf tournament. If you had to list your favourite numbers, they’re most likely 2, 3, 4, 18 and 72, and you spend 80% of dead-time practising your swing with an imaginary club and ball – and yet you always look to see where it went.

But how do you really know when you’re a golfer? Perhaps you need to buy this book to find out.